Britney Gets Slowed Down by Syrupy Euphoria on "3' Remix

Many songs are less than the sum of their parts, and Britney Spears’ latest single, “3” falls into this category, but it is by no means a bad thing because the parts are so sweet to the ear. It’s like eating a glossy, syrupy peach cobbler, but hating the crust. The original version of “3” with all of its arid synths and Lil’ Jon tendencies was nothing without the euphoric bridge that slow grinds its way into the mix. According to most of the people who have heard “3,” the bridge is the best part of the song. Taking that main ingredient of “3” and making it the sole beat for a “Slow Remix” is like taking the syrupy sweet peaches out of a peach cobbler and eating it by itself.

Presumably a fan of Britney is responsible for replacing the shrill synths of the original beat with the 7-note guitar loop that used to be the original’s bridge and the result is a thing of beauty. The beauty of the bridge was intensified on the original when heard in contrast to the aggressiveness of the rest of the original beat. Since the bridge has a larger presence on this remix, its trance vibe is even stronger bringing to mind glow-sticks lighting up a dark club full of horny, tipsy and/or drunk people. The bridge music conjures up that much beloved feeling of euphoria (usually alcohol-induced). When experiencing this euphoria, a person wants the feeling never to end, and doesn’t want the night to end; it’s a moment in time cherished through memory. People who partied in college know this feeling and people who party and go clubbing know this feeling too. This “Slow Remix” of “3” is a dance record, but it’s by no means a “club banger” because its purpose is not to get people energetic, but it’s more of song to dance to after you’re already intoxicated. It’s a song to listen to while basking in the blissful moment of intoxication when it feels like nothing bad can ever happen. This is the purpose of the “Slow Remix” of “3” and it is why I never get tired of listening to it; it inspires and exudes happiness.

Britney’s vocals are processed, but they reach a level of smoothness that fits the lushness of this “Slow Remix” perfectly. “3” is a set of melodic parts that work as a team, ironically a team of three, or maybe not ironically. The strength in melody can be credited to the song’s Swedish songwriters, Max Martin (the man responsible for “Baby One More Time”) and Shellback (wrote Britney’s controversial “If U Seek Amy”). The three parts are the chorus, the b-section and the bridge. The verses are good, but not nearly as melodic and catchy as the other parts. There are a few lyrics on “3” that makes one scratch their head because they seem so left-field. Most critics have said that “3” is a return to Britney’s bubblegum roots and is surprisingly wholesome, despite the whole threesome thing. However, on the b-section, Britney croons, “Are you in/living in sin is the new thing,” which seems like it would offend people—people have expected that it would since they have censored the word “sin” on some radio stations and in the “3” music video—but the whole “living in sin” thing is just another way of saying “I’m not that innocent,” which was Britney’s mantra when she debuted on the music scene in 1999. The fact that songwriter/producer Max Martin was involved with “3” makes sense of the reference to innocence since the song is a slight departure from Britney’s grimier (if that word can even be associated with Britney) songs on Blackout and some of her Circus album. “3” is sort of a blast from Britney’s past. Britney has always been a walking condition where she’ll perform a striptease on stage, but immediately after she will seem almost embarrassed by the striptease. It’s like Britney knows that the image she’s built for herself over the last ten years has been what people expect from her, so she stays true to that image in an almost workman-like manner. When Britney sings on the bridge on “3” that, “What we do is innocent/just for fun and nothing meant/if you don’t like the company/let’s just do it you and me,” she’s contradicting herself. She’s saying that if threesomes offend people then she wants to make sure they know that she also likes the more traditional one-on-one sexual encounter, and that she’s not really that much of a sex freak. Britney’s conflciting image of wholesome and devilish is her trademark, and it truly has become uniquely hers. The original version of “3” is the more sinful side of Britney and the “Slow Remix” of “3” is the angelic side, and ultimately the best and truest side.

The-Dream Touches Rihanna's "Hard" Single With His Oddball Magic

One of the many outstanding characteristics of Rihanna’s latest single, “Hard” is that The-Dream’s songwriting is the star of the show and acts as the thread that keeps the song sewn together. The brilliance of “Hard” proves once again that songwriters really are the unsung heroes of pop music.

The-Dream (born Terius Nash)—he wrote the No. 1 hits, “Umbrella” for Rihanna and “Single Ladies (Put A Ring On It)” for Beyonce—uses every centimeter and inch of Christopher “Tricky” Stewart’s unremarkable instrumental to fit in an abundance of hooks. The-Dream’s ability to create multiple hooks that support a big chorus has become his trademark. The “I’m so hard, so hard…yeah-yeah-yeah…” is immediately recognizable as a hook. Technically, there really is no chorus on “Hard,” but instead a barrage of hooks. The rest of the hooks are scattered around the song; for instance, the “and while you’re gettin’ your cry on/I’m gettin’ my fly on” line is only uttered once, yet it stays in the ear for a while. In contrast, the “I see you aimin’ at my pedestal/I better let you know” line is used twice, once at the end of the first verse and once at the end of the second verse, yet the “cry on/fly on” line is a bit more catchy, despite only sung once. The minimal repetition of the “pedestal” line is the sole conventional part of The-Dream’s songwriting on “Hard.” There also are no b-sections, no real bridge and no ad-libs. The-Dream just doesn’t follow the traditional verse-chorus-verse-bridge-chorus song structure.

Lyrically, “Hard” is a bragfest for Rihanna that acts to further affirm her as a fashion icon. She talks about having “all black on” and “black tall shades” and a “black tall Maybach.” We already knew Rihanna was a baller, and she has no problem reminding us. Rihanna even makes references to the song that changed her career, “Umbrella” when she sings one of the more subtly catchy hooks on “Hard”: “That Rihanna rain just won’t let up.”

Christopher “Tricky” Stewart’s overall sparse instrumental—which consists of a few tinkling piano keys, bass and a sinister groan that sounds sort of like a horn, but it sounds more like the product of a keyboard—would be a mediocre beat that sounds suspiciously similar to one of Young Jeezy’s past hits (who happens to spit 16 bars on “Hard”) without The-Dream’s oddball songwriting. Because of the beat’s sparseness, The-Dream is forced to create his own melody.

The official first single from Rihanna’s forthcoming album, Rated R is the Ne-Yo-penned “Russian Roulette,” but thankfully that dreary mess of a ballad slithered off and had a quiet death with little to no radio airplay, while Rihanna’s “second” single, “Hard” (the real first single) has had steady airplay, especially on R&B/hip-hop radio. I predict that audiences will respond well to “Hard” and its inventiveness. Plus, people don’t want to hear Rihanna’s sob songs, they instead want her to make them dance, which “Hard” certainly does.